Personal Updates, Collective Struggles, & Finding Motivation

- A Moony Energy Log -

I think I need a moment and safe space to release… So just bear with me. In a previous article I wrote about the maelstrom that Mars Retrograde facilitated in throwing me into; but you can’t have a whirlpool without a sea. There have been energetic shifts going on for months and it seems to be nearly impossible to constantly continue with the ‘hang in there, we are all together’ attitude in the face of a seemingly endless vortex of confusion. I catch myself asking how much longer, what else is coming, what have I not yet learned, am I misunderstanding the lessons that challenge me?

And to be completely honest, I don’t have the answers to all of those questions. In fact, I don’t have a solid answer for a single one of those questions. Sure, I have inklings, sure I have new experiences, sure I have more resources, and sure I have come to realize how much is necessary for me to release to move on. But again, you can’t have a maelstrom without the sea. I have spiraled my mind so far into the depths of misguided conclusions that I fail to see the rafts of patient guidance that drift between the tidal waves of my emotions, cast out by my families (soul and friendship). I think this moment has been gifted to me as a channel for collective awareness. A calling to open your eyes, even if it burns; to share your voice, even if the water tastes salty; to pull your head above the surface, even if the air is cold. 

I have been trying so hard, so strictly, to use the tools that I have to divine answers for what I am experiencing, for what I am going to experience, and what I am ‘supposed’ to learn. Never have I been one for just letting things be. I am a Sagittarius, it is in my stardust that I be inquisitive, curious, and thirsty for any and all perspectives of being that are attainable and more excitingly, perspectives that aren’t.

However, knowing and learning the pieces of myself that make me whole is where the real journey begins. I love to explore, I need a constant adventure to keep my mind free, my personality optimistic and charismatic. I need space to roam and relationships to grow. And with all of that, you would think that I have no fetters that bind me to expectations, I would have no impulses against going with the flow. Here I am though, expectations, fears, and an internal inflexibility infinitely knotted around my positive attributes.

So that portion that I am ‘supposed’ to learn? Yeah, that right there is in and of itself expectations and inflexibility.

Heck, it’s even fear of missing out! I have been keeping up to date on as much as I can handle in each moment and as much as I feel serves a purpose to my experience.

By learning about Mars Retrograde, Pluto Direct, and a few others that may be too much to get into right now, I have aimed my tools and practices into more specific areas of my life. By finding what resonates with me in the spiritual, be it through astrology, numerology, ect., I can ground and learn about my physical, mental, and emotional experiences to grow and work through. 

Although I know that the spiritual aspects of my interpretations of the Universe are what inspires me, that doesn’t mean I am not human. I slip up constantly, I delve too far, I don’t delve far enough, I ask goofy questions and repeat lessons over and over because I just can’t get it.

So to reflect back on the struggle of feeling alone, of not fully listening and feeling into the constant ‘hang in there, we are all together,’ know that it is true. Know that it may be the most simply infuriating snippet of advice, but also one of the most powerful snippets; because even though I have had my head spinning in a whirlpool, when I first took that step to open my eyes, I saw the life below water.

So although my eyes burned, I am learning that there is something so profound about the concept ‘as above so below’ that sends chills down my spine; awakening and tingling the parts of my Universal life force that keep wanting to hit snooze. It is a gentle pulse that beats along with the following ‘as within so without.’

We are so intricately intertwined like fish swimming through seaweed that sways to the oceans lullaby that we don’t often realize that there is someone right beside us. Our fins get tangled in the tidal number that when we bump into others, we brush by as though it was just the seaweed. Our concerns and mundane obstacles are slick along the stems and our sole focus, but when you take the second step, when you share your voice, those drifting between currents with you will hear.

What I love so much about the PBM2L online spiritual community is that we are rising up, reaching out, and finding others. So although the water may be salty, it’s a chalice that we drink from together. 

The struggles that we face within reflect those that are presented to us in our environments, without. What is without, we bring within and churn it out once more to how we release and express ourselves, and so the cycle continues. The way we ground below and the way we tap in above meets in the middle to create this perfect harmony of the two.

So when I hear ‘hang in there,’ I have learned to smile. I smile because I know that for others to say this to me, they too have once had to hear those very same words. To say ‘hang in there’ is to not just allow what the Universe serves up to you, blessings and challenges, to be just that: served to you.

I want you to take it, yes, I want you to hang in there, but hang in appreciation, in gratitude, in awareness, in excitement, in unity.

Know that the resources you need are available to you, know that they are the resources that are within you. Know that the resources within you will be the ones to manifest those without. There are so many ways to move yourself from a mindset of isolation and lack to one of all around prosperity.

Do rituals, journal, create art, go for a walk, exercise, socialize, record yourself ranting about everything that has been going down for you, cuddle with a pet or a partner, meditate, do what makes you feel good. Find that space that allows you to sigh so heavily the seaweed parts, so heavily that you release what no longer serves you to venture onto a path with a community and mindset that does.

None of this has to be fancy, and none of it has to be a big momentous occasion. It all starts with that breath of personal guidance, that breath of ‘I am ready.’ 

So go do something for you. I am being your permission slip, as Shannon Shine has had to be mine in many a session and podcast, to step into a reality with others that takes you on your soul's journey. 

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All of that being said… Here is some motivation from me to you to go out and have some fun…

Here is me chilling in a tree after going for a long walk with two of my close friends. I may have fallen asleep, I may not have, all I know is that it was one of the best meditations I could have done from the weirdness of my week prior.

And here I am doing the muggle things (aka working on course assignments) whilst still treating myself to a different atmosphere… Not to mention a matcha latte, yuummmmm.

With much light and many blessings,

Moony